These special men in our lives are imperfect people, but they hold a very important position in the family. They are the head of the home and therefore deserve the love and respect that position necessitates.
I know there are some husbands/fathers who are easier to love and respect than others. And there are wives who are more prone to seek out ways to make their husbands happy in the home.
There have been times in my life I have slipped into more negative attitudes towards my husband. The children pick up on it right away. It is damaging because the children see our example. If it is consistent, it affects the stability and the love in the home.
Remember that your children will follow your example in respecting and loving their father (and eventually their own husbands or superiors) in the home. They will also learn to disregard you, the mother, if they see you disrespecting your husband. It really does come back to bite us.
We need to take a hard look at our own attitudes towards our husbands and recognize an unhealthy outlook and battle against it.
Our first line of defense in getting our children to love and respect us is to first love and respect our husbands. In the Catholic home there should be no putting down of your husband. Our husband should be highly esteemed and revered. Marriage is a picture of Christ and His Church and we need to work on reflecting that in our actions towards our husbands.
Pamela Spurling says:
“What *is* important is that you love him. What’s important is that you esteem and respect him. What’s important is that you demonstrate it to him. What’s important is that you show it around your children. What’s important is that you demonstrate that reverential love around others.
What’s important is that you learn to mean it with your whole heart. Even if he never gets that shed cleaned out. Even if he never gets the yard in order or mows that lawn diagonally so it looks better than neighbor Joe’s. Even if he never says things the way you think he should, or chews with his mouth closed, or keeps his shirt tucked in right, or gets you the right birthday presents or finishes household projects. Even if he never makes you all the wooden goodies Mr. John Doe makes for his wife, or never buys you surprise gifts. Even if he never learns anything more about automobiles than where to put the key to start them and where to put the gas to keep them running. So what.
What’s important is that you do what the LORD has designed you to do… and let the LORD work on your husband’s weak spots. I think we have much to work on without overly concerning ourselves with what they are or are not.
There is an amazing thing that wives can do and that is to love and support and build up husbands, and what a joyful thing it is to see the husband growing into the man God has designed him to be.
So, if you have been caught in the trap or habit of putting down your husband, mocking his leadership, disobeying known desires, disrespecting his words and views… rolling your eyes at his latest idea… sighing at his most recent business plan… you can turn. You can turn today. You can turn today and travel a different path. You can turn today and travel the path that God has designed for you.”
Today is Father’s Day. The one day of the year that is chosen to honor Dad. Let’s make it special. Let’s make a sincere effort to make him number one in our lives!
One of our friends asked my husband if we were doing anything special for Father’s Day. He smiled at her and said, “Every day is Father’s Day!” I was humbled and I admit, it is because he is a good man with a great attitude! 🙂