It was one of those normal days…. housework, homeschooling, and the usual hubbub of grandchildren.

Vincent had been at work and came home late.

That’s when he dropped the bombshell…”I picked up this guy in Topeka. He’s homeless and needs a place to stay until he gets something else”.il_570xN.221050600

Now my husband is known for his charity. It exceeds the norm and the rest of us tremble when he comes up with his next venture in kindness. This was one of those trembling times.

I really struggle at times like this. I know God expects us to go the extra mile. But what about my kids…..!!!???

I uncomfortably agree to him staying in the addition (which is attached to the house) for a couple of days. And so that is what he does.

He eventually finds his way to an apartment and hubby employs him. This guy has had a rough past, that is for sure. You really have to wonder if this is going to be the time when he really gives it all up.

Hubby is hopeful, I am skeptical.

In the meantime, we have some good times with him. He plays volleyball with us, eats with us and just chews the fat with all of us as we sit around visiting.

One day we were talking. I don’t know if he was telling us about his own relationship with his deceased wife or if we were just talking about relationships in general. Our friend said something that has resonated with me since then. It was very profound and has depths of meaning in it.

It could really be a motto for any husband or wife. He said, “Do you want to be RIGHT? Or do you want to be HAPPY?”

How often through the years I have had to live by this motto.

It’s called overcoming your pride.

When we’re having one of our differences and he is really getting under my skin and I know my point of view makes more sense 🙂 , I have to ask myself, “Do I want to be right? Or do I want to be happy?” 

We can stew about stuff, give him the silent treatment and wait for him to apologize (I don’t. It doesn’t work) but really when it comes right down to it….we want to be happy.

The differences we are experiencing don’t matter as much as loving one another…as keeping that friendliness and intimacy that is so important between husband and wife.

So we need to swallow our pride and apologize. Or if we have nothing to apologize for, just try to forget it and let him know you love him.

And things are so much better.

It is not worth it.  Get over yourself and learn some humility….

As for our friend, he stuck around for about 6 months. Vincent gave him his small truck and he got it impounded because he returned to his life of drinking. Last I heard he was evicted from his apartment and has moved on.

I will never forget him, though, every time I think of his life lesson. God help him.imagesLITANY OF HUMILITY

O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.
From the desire of being esteemed,

Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being loved…Deliver me, Jesus
From the desire of being extolled …
From the desire of being honored …
From the desire of being praised …
From the desire of being preferred to others…
From the desire of being consulted …
From the desire of being approved …
From the fear of being humiliated …
From the fear of being despised…
From the fear of suffering rebukes …
From the fear of being calumniated …
From the fear of being forgotten …
From the fear of being ridiculed …
From the fear of being wronged …
From the fear of being suspected …

That others may be loved more than I,
Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be esteemed more than I …Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That, in the opinion of the world,
others may increase and I may decrease …
That others may be chosen and I set aside …
That others may be praised and I unnoticed …
That others may be preferred to me in everything…
That others may become holier than I,
provided that I may become as holy as I should…